Project "Why don't we talk about..." was inspired by my personal experience on the shame that surrounds the topic of FEMALE MASTURBATION. This also includes my own struggle with the relationship with my body, masturbation and my sexuality in general. What inspired me was the realization that we know very little about the topic of female masturbation; how myths about it have been passed on by word of mouth through generations, or even worse, by churches (usually said by male priest who have no idea about female body and sexuality). On top of everything the absolute failure of sex education at schools and also at home. If mothers don't feel comfortable to masturbate or talk about masturbation, then how could they explain this in a healthy positive way to their daughters? When I say how little do 'we' know, I also meant myself... how little did I know. I began to question how was I educated? What did I know about masturbation? How have I been conditioned to think about it as a "sinful act" - and what impact did it have on my life? I only new of female masturbation the way it is portrayed in porn, which is often represented through a male gaze. Then I started researching, reading, watching videos and documentaries. That's when it hit me how wrong, we as a society (to date) look at female masturbation! Could this be the outcome of not only a horrible approach to the topic by society, but also the repeated shame and misconceptions? And then it hit me eve harder when I realized that I'm probably not the only woman who could feel this way. In my work, I wanted to point out that perhaps we should normalize the education and conversation about female masturbation; talk about the benefits of it, talk about the fun which comes with it and most importantly talk about how healthy is to have a relationship with your body and your sexuality - not based on shame. In the photograph I am placing the vibrator with the cooking utensils in the kitchen, normalizing by comparing female masturbation to everyday task such as cooking. We regularly talk about the "benefits of healthy eating"... which made me think why couldn't we talk about healthy masturbating? Women are being judged when they are sexual, when they masturbate, especially if they are open about it, they have been perceived as "dirty", "slutty", "most likely to be unfaithful" etc etc. What's worth a mention is that because we are constantly being bombarded with the faulty, destructive messages from all over, very often this shame will grow in a woman internally. She may associate female sexuality with being unclean without even realizing it, so this simply cannot have a good outcome and this needs to change. Unfortunately men often do not help the situation (wether they mean to or not), sometimes they feel intimidated by the idea that women can pleasure themselves without their help, they can be intimidated by sex toys. They could even believe in myths such as, once a woman orgasms when masturbating she won't be interested in the intercourse later or she might not be able to orgasm; which is understandable if they are comparing female orgasm to male ejaculation, which is completely different. In fact, women who masturbate more often have better sexual experiences and can reach orgasm much easier. Knowing your own body first helps others to know your body because you can communicate what works as we are all different. Masturbation can keep up your sex drive, couples might also have more fun using sex toys together, so there is many benefits for both sides. But still there is plenty of myths to be destroyed and a lot of education to be done in order to make females more comfortable in their own skin and in their own minds when it comes to masturbation.

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Martyna Madej is Polish artist based in UK.
In her art work she explores topics of identity,
sexuality, human existence, body and mind. 
Madej's practice involves both digital and analogue
photography, and also videography. 

​www.mmadej.com  Instagram profiles: @mad.edge and @marty.clown